Why?

Why did the Guiding Light kill off Tammy even after i sent CBS an email vowing to never watch the show again if they did?  Of course i was lying.

 In a rare Soap Opera scene actually filmed outdoors, after Tammys funeral her husband/cousin Jonathan drove his car off a cliff.  When no trace of his remains were found after the consequent explosion i knew he was faking his death.

Being a Trailer Park denizen i know a thing or two about pyrotechnics and the blast from that sedan crash wasnt big enough to blow off more than a pinkie, his left Nike and maybe a chunk of ear lobe.  No way would he be vaporized.  Even if he did use a lot of flammable hair products. 


Why?

Why no matter how far out i park my crappy economy car (with the fake spoiler) in a parking lot it will end up sandwiched between two freakin monster trucks and i'll have to back out blindly?  The roadhogs also will be so big i barely have room to open the door and sometimes have to crawl in through the hatchback.


Why?

Why cant i pay full price for a calendar i need and will use daily?

 I cant buy a calendar before the end of the year when the choices are still good.  I have to wait until the first week of January when they go on sale for half price.  Its not like that $5 savings makes a difference so theres no real reason for this behavior.

I dont take my calendar selection lightly either.  I use it frequently so the photos are very important.  Usually i go with nice Southwestern scenes but this year my shopping trip was delayed and by the time i made it to the mall the choices were limited.

After deciding against calendars of Corvettes, rainbows, power tools and bimbos i was left with Tim McGraw.   Not bad but i'm definitely not digging on his metrosexual redneck look.  C'mon a wifebeater tank with a shearling jacket casually tossed over his shoulder and two necklaces?  He needs a new stylist and i need a new calendar.


Why?

Why have the last four years of w%$k been the worst ever as far as my cow%$kers go?




This was snapped just last night.  Pictured in the foreground are the slovenly mouthbreathers, nothing more to say about them.

In living color we have the Ugly Stepsisters.  Not really sisters and not all that ugly until you get to know them.   Can normally be found huddled together gossiping, backstabbing our sweet boss to HR and sucking on cigarettes outside at breaktime.

The unlovely one in pink is the leader and the sneakiest.  Shes deceptive at first with talk of her education, travel and yoga. She also goes into heat anytime a man is near.  46 going on 14.  

Her minion in green is not quite as sneaky evil but never ever never stops bitching.  Shes also in desperate need of  perpetual thanking.  I do believe in good manners but she is one of those who will continually say what she is doing for YOU, unasked for of course, so you have to notice her and say Thank you.  When in reality she just doing the daily crap that needs to be done by our dept for the company.

Finally one day i thanked her on behalf of Acme Anvil for earning her paycheck.

This post is very long and its bedtime so i'll end it now with a special picture for YOU!   Thank me later.
 

posted by: rustymadgal at 02/13/07 05:45 | link | comments (12) |

Furry bastards doing what they do best, second only to eating.  At least somebodys getting some sleep around here.

 As told months ago roomie saved his pennies and bought a big HDTV, recliners and HD DVD player with 37 surround sound speaker goodness.  Roomie is very good about saving money and not a big consumer but he does love sports and this HDTV has been his dream since he visited his sister and saw their setup last year.

 The Princess promptly chewed up a speaker wire and the $450 DVD player system quit w$#king.  Roomie took it back to the store and they sent if off for service. 

The store finally called two weeks ago Roomie went to pick it up.  The kid at the counter asked for $171.  Roomie repeated $171??!!!  And the kid said nevermind its probably covered under warranty.  We havent heard a word from them since. 

Whatever,  I managed to rehook the 17 wires (no shit) correctly and the player w#@ks fine but we've only watched one movie so far.

The HDTV was still hooked up to regular cable so Roomie ordered a HD dish.  We had 4 appts with the service guy.  Three he never showed up for, when he finally did our neighbors trees are blocking the satellite up in space.

  Its expected cable guys never show  but the daytime is my middle of the night so i had to get up all 4 days to wait for the asshole and we still get nothing but regular cable.  Poor little deprived trailer dwellers are we.

There is another dish company with a different satellite but less HD channels, that guy actually showed for his appt but the trees block their satellites as well.

 He was friendly but as he was leaning over the desk writing a note for roomie The Princess snuck up and tried to kiss him on the lips.  He recoiled like she had the plague.  I was a little offended at his reaction.  Who wouldnt want a smooch from The Princess?

Years ago when Son first came to live with me i rented the most rundown 10 ft wide trailer ever but it was in a meadow surrounded by the forest.   Great location, would see my elk brothers nightly on our dirt road but a dive to live in.  In some spots the floor didnt even reach the walls.   Was there because the slumlord didnt care about pets.  He had given the little park some kind of bucolic name but i called it Cheese Valley.

 After those 3 rough years i gave up trying to fully support myself and dedicated our lives to sponging off others who have the drive to better themselves.  Cable TV didnt even go that far out but when it finally did i ordered it. 

Same story, waited several days for the tech to show up.  The cute guy who finally did show up captured Sons heart.  This is one of my favorite Son memories, the dude was kneeling down drilling a hole in our wall and Son was sitting behind him leaning up against the dudes back.  It was so cute.  The guy melted and probably from the looks of our poverty and Sons adorableness wouldnt take the $45 installation fee.

In the midst of all this current sleep deprived Hi Def drama including lots of mandatory overtime at my crappy job, Roomies daughter and foulmouthed little grandson come to visit for a few days.   Foulmouth just started preschool and i think its doing him some good.  It was a whole four hours after they arrived until i heard  him utter his first swear word.  Then he was on a roll.

We all went out to dinner and on the way home i asked Roomie to pull over at this park that still had holiday lights up i hadnt seen.  We were all in the parking lot doing the fake oohhhs and ahhhhhs and i told foulmouth he had to say Oooohhhh.  He told me he wasnt a douche bag.  Thats arguable but i didnt get into it with a 3 1/2 year old.  Dorkasaurus!

posted by: rustymadgal at 02/06/07 16:05 | link | comments (5) |