My stupid roomie sneezed and snotted all over the trailer last week including the keyboard and now I'm sick.  Been taking Zicam so it hasnt been that bad but i'm playing it up anyway. 



Last night was the worst, the cooties really hit my throat.  My voice dropped way down but not in that sexy Kathleen Turner kind of way, no i sounded more like a chain smoking truck stop waitress who was voted MVP of her bowling league. 



Roomie brings home a cold every few months sometimes i dont know how hes lasted this long.  Hes like that old story about the  turkeys looking up when it rains to see whats hitting them on the head and drowning because their beaks are open.

At the height of his illness i brought him home a couple of murdered chicken burritos for dinner.  He ate one and let the second one sit out on the counter for the next 16 hours.   I didnt even notice it until he finally  put it back in the fridge.  Awestruck,  I couldnt say a word,  had to wait and see if he  was really going to eat it.

A few hours later heard the microwave going and sure enough he was heating it up.   According to roomies logic the burrito was still good because it had been in its paper  wrapper all night at room temperature. It definitely had real sour cream by then.
 I countered with if that were the case we would need no refrigerator because all the food in there was wrapped too and should stay good.

By this time i was hoping the Road Runner would just drop an Acme Anvil on my head and put me out of my misery.   Just then the microwave beeped and roomie put the burrito in question on a plate.   Just before he took a bite he changed his mind and threw it out saying i had ruined it for him.  Yep, thats right, i suck.

posted by: rustymadgal at 02/21/06 12:36 | link | comments (7) |

Had a run in with the law on my way to w%#k while being chased by paparazzi.  Was on a residential street dutifully going the 25 mph speed limit and The Man said i ran a stop sign.  I honestly dont know what happened.  Remembered approaching the sign and the next thing i know being pulled over by two squad cars.

It was dark out, not even 6 a.m. and my head was all fuzzy.  When officer number one asked if i knew why he pulled me over the only thing i could think of to say was "Because you wanted to ask me out?"  Its not that i think i'm cute but he certainly was.  Young men in uniform, mmm mmm. 

Anyway i didnt really say that, it was scary, didnt say much of anything.  Normally my brain jumps right into action but the only thing i could think of doing was maybe trying to cry.  Not very original.   It wouldnt have been too hard to work up some tears, i was on my way to w$#k after all.

I dont carry a purse so everything a girl could need is somewhere in my car.  As the hunky man in blue was shining his light in my car i'm digging through the glove box for my info.  Besides four years worth of oil change receipts and proof of insurance cards the glove box also contains the free worlds largest tampon cache.  When officer number two  saw i was armed with nothing more dangerous than a Super Plus he took off.

Officer number one went back to his car for the longest time.  Its funny the things i thought of waiting there blinded by the lights flashing behind me.  How i was now going to work all day just to pay the ticket...did anyone i know drive by... being handcuffed by him wouldnt really be the worst thing that ever happened to me. When he finally came back he had only written me a warning!  I said thank you about 23 times and that was it.  For one day fame did have its privilege.

posted by: rustymadgal at 02/17/06 04:08 | link | comments (1) |

Today my blog is featured!  Still not in the phone book but for the next 24 hours I'm somebody.  I mentioned this Blog in Space thing yesterday but when you live a life thats lean on accomplishment  you learn to milk it for all its worth.   This reminds me of my childhood when i'd bring home a really good grade like a B+ and we'd tape it on the fridge.

George Clooney, if you're thinking of calling since I've hit the big time its too late.  Right now I'm way  busy enjoying the fame and fortune and everything that goes with it it all besides i have to take the trash out before w*%k.  Hope I'm not hounded by paparazzi.

posted by: rustymadgal at 02/16/06 03:41 | link | comments (4) |

Yesterday i received the following email from the blog in space humanoids...

Congratulations! Blog in Space.com has crowned your blog with the title of "Most Likely To Be Contacted" for its outstanding ability to potentially provoke alien responses back to Planet Earth. This means your blog will be featured on the homepage of BloginSpace.com on February 16, 2006 complete with a screenshot and a link to your site.

Wow!   All i can say is thanks and you like me!  You really like me!   Of course none of this would be possible without Motime.com the best blog site this side of Alpha Centauri.  Thanks hardworking little people!

My blog has been beamed into space since last summer as part of my plan to bore the Universe into submission. 

My son is thrilled with the possibility of us being contacted by aliens.  Hes outside right now waiting with open paws.  Actually living in a trailer park does improve your odds of sighting UFOs and on the downside, tornados.



As i posted last August, we still are open to the idea of relocating to a new planet if the right alien comes along.  However we'd like to add that we're looking for a cuddly alien who also likes to ride bikes and Reeses Pieces, crop circles ok too, not invasive medical testing and cattle mutilation.

posted by: rustymadgal at 02/15/06 03:51 | link | comments (4) |

For American Girl, my not so secret Valentine since she drew the random names.

posted by: rustymadgal at 02/14/06 03:38 | link | comments (4) |

Just a little You're Number One to the seemingly endless touron parade of scenic flights skimming the treetops over a wilderness area. 

The whole idea of a wilderness area is just that, wilderness.  The Man even has signs posted prohibiting things such as motorized vehicles, bicycles and hang gliding but this is ok.

posted by: rustymadgal at 02/12/06 17:52 | link | comments (3) |